Compared to the lives of our grandparents, our lives are far more complex today. Achieving personal happiness, being part of a fulfilling relationship, and cultivating success in all the other "human" aspects of our life is becoming more and more complicated.
As a result, you invest more time, energy and money towards your personal development. You try to acquire the knowledge that will help you make the most of yourself. With what you learn and experience, you try to simplify (makes sense of!) the complicated matters in life.
I am guessing that by now you must have exposed yourself to a hefty dose of personal development books, articles, and even audio tapes. The moment you read or listen, you find it inspiring. You get fired up and say, "I CAN try this out". It happens one day, and the next and then eventually, the idea is forgotten.
Have you ever wondered why it's not as effective as it should be? Could it be because what you read was not good enough or could it be on the these reasons:
* Filtering out gems
With each passing day, there are more and more personal development materials published. We all face the dilemma of finding the most suitable personal development book because if we're going to spend time implementing something new, it ought to be something that truly fits. I agree that recommendations and best sellers lists are a deciding factor. However, due to your individuality, what may be a "good fit" for someone, may not be as effective for you. Choose wisely.
* Willingness to change
We all long for stability in our lives which represents a comfort zone we want to live in. As you might already be aware, personal development requires a fair amount of actionable change. Reading a book will not help you become thin, rich, well-balanced and ecstatically happy! It's the actions you take and the mindset you develop that will enable change.
As we are creatures of our habits, any proposed change to this comfort zone is greeted with apprehension. As we get older we become even more set in our ways, and less likely to accept change.
* Cynicism
By nature some people are skeptical about personal development books. They have a personal vendetta against self-help and motivational speakers; they believe that it's a highly commercialized industry and there's nothing they can get out of it. When you think about it, what qualifies a self-help expert to be a self-help expert?
* Personal development is interpreted as added stress
Most of us are busy enough that we don't have the time or energy to "improve". Only a handful of people view personal development as a means of correcting minor problems (which leads to lowering stress, in the long run).
* Afraid of being disappointed
This is somewhat related to reasons 2, 3 and 4. You are afraid to give yourself (and maybe even loved ones) hope, because you are convinced that it won't work out.
* Finding an adequate barometer
Given the fact that personal development is different for different people, how do you empirically measure "personal growth"? Most of us like to keep a note of our progress, and depending on the "growth domain", this can be daunting task.
* It's too difficult
Some personal development material promises highly unrealistic results. They have attractive titles which will convince you of quick-fix solutions to difficult human challenges.
As days go by, you become aware that it takes more than a fancy title and alluring words to get the results you desire; you realize it requires a considerable (sometimes monumental!) effort, patience and willpower. As a result, you are not making the progress you thought you would. It makes you irritated and you give up early.
What are the reasons you struggle with the most? In your opinion, why do you think personal development is not as effective as it should be?
-ShamelleDo you have a bucket list? Here are 101 things to do before you die. Includes a tutorial on how you can create your bucket list too!
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